Newspaper Headlines

Man Kills Self Before Shooting Wife and Daughter  This one I caught in the SGV Tribune the other day and called the Editorial Room and asked who wrote this.  It took two or three readings before the editor realized that what he was reading was impossible!!!  They put in a correction the next day.   Something Went Wrong in Jet Crash, Expert Says       No, really? Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers        Now that's taking things a bit far! Panda Mating Fails; Veterinarian Takes Over        What a guy!   Miners Refuse to Work after Death          No-good-for- nothing' lazy so-and-so's! Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant.      See if that works any better than a fair trial! War Dims Hope for Peace         I can see where it might have that effect! If Strike Isn't Settled Quickly, It May Last Awhile          Ya think?! Cold Wave Linked to Temperatures           Who would have thought!   Enfield (  London ) Couple Slain; Police Suspect Homicide            They may be on to something! Red Tape Holds Up New Bridges         You mean there's something stronger than duct tape?! Oklahoma's construction program!  Man Struck By Lightning: Faces Battery Charge         He probably IS the battery charge New Study of Obesity Looks for Larger Test Group         Weren't they fat enough?! Astronaut Takes Blame for Gas in Spacecraft          That's what he gets for eating those beans! Kids Make Nutritious Snacks         Do they taste like chicken? Local High School Dropouts Cut in Half        Chainsaw Massacre all over again! Hospitals are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors             Boy, are they tall! And the winner is.... Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead            Did I read that right? Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even a chuckle). We all need a good laugh, at least once a day!